Lookin back

Love the way i smell in the morning.. =)) My shirt, hair, soft skin.. Im lesbian to myself. Hurhurhur.

Ok, im attempting to reflect on all my previous relationships on this post. Not sure for what, maybe to clear the rubbish at the back of my mind?

A whole bunch of ACS guys back when i was in PLMGS. The only person that caught my eyes was decent David. Asst Head Prefect, smart guy, cute, hot, great personality, maybe a little shy-he kinda summarized what i wanted then. We never got close except those times whereby we discussed Golf. -_-

The guy that came along was Darius. Cute. Very cute in fact. Tann, american accent, smart, debator, sportsman. Woah. Everything i might want now. But he came at the wrong time. Kinda let go when he got his scholarship to UK.

Some other minor 'boyfriends' back in secondary school. Cant remember their face or names. Gees.

All guys?? No, not really. All my crushes were girls. Okie, prepare to slap me now. I wont mention their names. Maybe i couldnt even differentiate crushes, infatuation and admiration when i was 13-16 years old. Up till i was 18, Jasmine Tea actually caught my frikkin eyes. Good/cool looking bungs will definitely make my head turn. Damn..im lesbian..thats the end.

Then came Edward. My 2nd suitor in college. Not very successful but but but, at least i cherished everything he has done for me. Not quite the guy i wanted to be with..however, he cares for me alot. Bought me flowers, a hell lot of bouquets, gifts that i loved and cakes that i dont get to eat very often. He's uber intelligent. Everyone recognised him as the "best-in-economics" guy. In contrast, me as the "top runner". We're from almost 2 different worlds. Characteristics/personality clashes. We often argued, super-egoed to the max. Did we get along?? At times yes. He was persistant..i admired his courage in being honest with me-all the time. Tears were part of the entire chase..i can only say sorry. We will remain as friends though..let memories flood our souls everytime we think of each other or the past.

That idiotic Maurice everyone warned me about back in college. How the hell did he get my number. But his initiate motive was get to make friends with me because i played the violin. Wow..?! But we grew extremely close to each other till this very day. We care for each other so very much. So many blemishes on my face, yet he kisses them. Broke as he is sometimes, he still buys for me things i want. Did i make him poor?? Oh shit. Haha. Im not exactly that high-maintainance, really. My parents embrace his presence in my house. Although i have a feeling my elder sister loathes him. He is not good as most boys're..but putting all those aside, what matters is that he wants nothing but the best for me. He's always there for me. We speak to each other every night. Yes, EVERY night for 2 years and 3 mths. He's my best friend, my boy friend..not everything i want but im not thinking of marrying yet so it doesnt matter. We love each other..not those lovely-dovey love but it's when u care about someone and you hope they're happy.

Then came Daryl. After communicating for 2 years, we thought we might get something going. However, everything just falls apart. Im not longer on his MSN list, neither am i on his FRIENDSTER list or bookmarked in his blog. Prolly my number's not in his cellphone anymore. Im not gonna whine and get upset all bout it though im kinda forlorn of all hope of us, being friends. Concluded that if we cannot start of-platonic, it aint possible for any advancement. Its a pity..cant even be friends.

Thats bout it. All kinda sad huh. *shrugs* Relationship is not on my priority list so..not gonna put much thoughts into it.

My eyes're allegic to smoke?? Darn..puffy and bloodshot now. No thanks to the Mothers' Day dinner at Chomps last night. Stupid dirtyboy refuse to come along..he preferred to wait till i get back home. Meanwhile, he left his dirty laundry after a run in my bathroom. *Eew* He'll be confined next week..meanwhile im jobless..time's gonna pass real slow. Someone date me please!!! Fantastic weather yet im not at Sentosa..sigh..Phuture this Wednesday anyone?? I realise most of my close friends dont club..wonder why.