Farmart

I think im a little freaked out.
The conversation with J got serious.
I thought i was ready for it.

I dont wanna end up hurting him.
I know he is an awesome guy.
What if he gives me time to like him but i end up not liking him romantically?
It's him i'll end up hurting.
And of course i wont be able to live it down knowing that someone is heartbroken.

I want to try.
But everytime i take a tiny step closer to you, i end up pausing then taking another 10 steps back.

What am i afraid of?
Just what am i afraid of?
I have my uncertainties and fear.
I know that.

Maybe cause i know he might not be the man i wanna live with, for the rest of my life.
But i dont wanna render someone 'dead' when i didnt even give it a shot.
Who knows right. Just who knows.

I want to be fair to him as well.
But in love, can it really be fair?

Love freely.
Am i going to give it a shot just because...shit...i dont even know the reason of giving myself/you a shot??!

--

Caught 'A Single Man' with you today.
I figured out there and then that i still don't have romantic feelings for you.
I'm not going to rush it.
If it comes, it comes.

Go with the flow.

I know you're emo & maybe slightly disappointed with some issues i raised up.
And i hate talking about it (emo stuff) seriously.

At this point, im still kinda uncertain.
Not about you J.
Its me.
Its always me.
What's wrong with me!